Saturday, 29 August 2015

Things Indian parents need to pipe down about : DATING

Before beginning I want to be clear about a few things:
1. No offence is meant to anyone. These are simply my opinion on a couple of things and I don't claim to be right about all of them.
2. Simply an opinion. Again, this post is just random and none of this should be taken to heart.
3. I love my parents a lot and have great respect for others' parents too. I don't intend to insult anyone or point fingers.

Indian parents are known to be unique in their own ways. They can be their kid's best friend and at the same time their worst nightmare. It's actually very hard to explain. There are some things that parents do that has annoyed every kid at some point of their life. I don't know if these 'traits' apply to parents worldwide but I'm sure almost every Indian kid can relate to this.
Indian parents are the world's biggest control freaks who feel the need to plan out every single second of their kids' lives.

Now with changing times this utter control seems to be slipping out of their hands and they've started to freak out whenever they realise this.

Dating
I have always failed to understand why the idea of a girl and a guy hanging out together is seen as 'wrong'. Dating someone is not wrong. It's a free country and a modern world now, people don't need to be phobic of the opposite sex till their 20s and then marry someone their parents feel is the best for them. It simply does not work that way anymore. If you ask me, days of arranged marriages are over. Parents need to let their kids go out there and find love on their own and not be 'made to fall in love' with a stranger just because the families get along well.
Indian kids are told right from the beginning that it's bad for us to interact with kids of the opposite sex in more than a friendly way and that it's a huge and absolutely unnecessary distraction.
This is also one of the reasons people require dating apps, ask others out on social media or via text. Because they're either trying to suppress feelings for others or have no idea on how to approach the person they like and feel to damn shy too face them.
Let go. Please. Being overprotective isn't going to help. Yes, people do sometimes pick the wrong person and make bad decisions that sometimes ends up messing up their entire lives but that is because they just suck at making the right choices. And despite being kept from dating they're bound to mess up maybe even worse at some point. People do learn from their mistakes even when it comes to dating. Maybe the idea of dating as mere kids of 13 is not such a good idea but if it works out well, who knows! Childhood sweethearts exist and so do teen lovers. Not every relationship is bound to be a train wreck. And there's nothing wrong in trying to salvage the damage done in those wrecks by starting afresh. Like life, dating and finding love is a continuous process till people find what they seek.

For more things in life almost every Indian kid wishes their parents would stop making a big deal of, stay tuned.

-The Geek

Tuesday, 25 August 2015

The truth behind teen 'rants'

Teenager. What's the first word that pops in your mind?
Confused, angry, emo, vengeful, adrenaline-driven, spoilt brats? Not all of them but most of them may be true. We may seem immature, naive and totally driven by our hearts and not minds but we're just regular people. Trust me, we teenagers are not that difficult to understand. We're not acting rebellious all the time but misunderstood most of the time.

Having a strong opinion is not the same as being unreasonable.

Just because teens have been misunderstood a lot right from the beginning of time a lot is simply assumed about them. A single emotional outbreak or one moment of rage does not mean teenagers are solely driven by emotions. A single act does not define a person. Our opinions and ideas are classified under rants. We're simply not to be taken seriously by the world.

Our 'rants' may sound like just an angry teen complaining about life but if people could actually listen, not just hear, but listen to what we say and try to relate to it things would be a lot easier for both sides. Take teenagers seriously. We're not just a bunch of kids with crazy ideas but people who want to be heard.

What may sound like plain complaints are stories that together sum up the way a teenager sees the world. It's not always the hormones and emotions speaking. Rants are triggered by reasons. And when the reasons are strong enough they give rise to revolution.


-The Geek

Wednesday, 29 July 2015

Why being an introvert ain't that bad

Fitting in is important. One is required to go with the flow, blend with the trend in order to survive.

Not everyone has the ability to do that. Some people are just different from the rest. They are unique in their own way. Being accepted by people around us is something that can never be predicted. What may be boring to some may be the trendiest thing ever to a different crowd.
The thing is, all of us want to be accepted in society. On being treated as an outcast, we look for a different crowd to mingle with, or rebel against those who rejected us, or keep trying to do things that will make us acceptable in the eyes of others.

Being all by yourself is the most difficult thing to do. When it is a single person against many it feels like the whole world is against you. Darwin's theories are still valid. If you project yourself as a weak person, the world will consume you in no time.
You can take a stand, dare to be different.  Facing the consequences and living with them requires tons of courage.

When the world casts you aside, know that you're safe.
It's true.

People only take advantage of others when there is something that can be held against that person. Those who are manipulated for all the wrong reasons is because the people who did that to them knew what they did or how they felt on the inside.
No one can make you feel inferior or use your thoughts and feelings against you if they don't know what they are in the first place. Enemies strike at the point of weakness. By keeping all weaknesses, secrets and feelings concealed all harm can be avoided. It's not important what others think of you. Only what you feel inside does. So showing your true self to the world is not necessary. Don't let them know who you truly are, what you are capable of.

Being an introvert keeps your ideas, beliefs, thoughts, secrets and feelings safe.  Keeps you safe. It's like having a protective shield around yourself at all times. You won't need others to make you feel safe. You will protect yourself. You will be your own person.

Live for yourself. Fight for yourself. Be yourself. Without having to worry about the rest of the world.
It's not loneliness, it's called freedom.

-The Geek

Wednesday, 3 June 2015

Why watching porn is NOT wrong

Porn. Everyone knows what it's like. Everyone enjoys it. I mean, let's face it, no matter how much you resist all the moaning and kinky things happening on screen, you're bound to feel a little something.

In my opinion, watching porn is not wrong.
It's just watching people have sex. Or foreplay. That's it.
Why make a big deal out of it and judge the audience?
People know how it works. They know how it's done and they know what happens afterwards too. Why are people judged on admitting to watching porn? Whether they do it in real life is a different case. But what is wrong in watching? The videos, movies and photos have been made for people to see. Those seen on screen are willingly showing it off.
If the people being recorded while having sex have no objection, those watching it do not object to the content (why would they), why does anyone have to be judged?

Some might think gangbangs and threesomes, even gay porn is perverted. Again, those doing it are enjoying themselves, those watching definitely are. What is the damn problem when everyone's happy and horny?
Some are judged on being horny too, mostly teens. Mostly by their parents. I don't get that either. I mean, we do have hormones that make us horny. It's completely natural. If nature meant for things to be this way then why object?

People having sex after watching porn is a different topic of debate altogether. Every human being has a natural urge for intimacy. How they go about it is completely up to them.

The desire to have sex is not wrong either.

It's natural. The entire process is. If you feel guilty for wanting to have sex, you need to shake it off. People may have told you that's it's wrong to have such feelings but that's simply not true. 

Kids who watch porn need to know what the results are as well. Having sex is not just about the fun, it's about being responsible enough to handle the consequences as well.

Watching porn may be unproductive and pointless. But definitely not wrong.

Those who watch porn are just watching. People can't be judged for enjoying themselves. If you wanna; judge rapists, pervs who sexually abuse kids, molesters and many others whose urge turns into frenzy that proves to be fatal for others.

It is the people who misuse the info, the media, technology and so on.
Watching is not a sin. What's happening on screen is consentual. Using the same to harm others is one that can never be forgiven.

Porn is not wrong. It's the people.

-The Geek


Tuesday, 2 June 2015

Life of an Indian teenager

Being an Indian teenager is hard. "Why?", you ask? Allow me to break it down for you :

We're forced to excel in every field. And by 'every field' I mean academics only. Being a good dancer, singer, artist, writer etc is unacceptable.
Infact daring to be creative is a sin.
 We are simply not allowed to follow our dreams. To Indian parents, the definition of having a 'good career' includes only being a doctor, engineer, lawyer or any other job with a mundane schedule that earns us enough money to move out of our parents' houses and let them live in peace.
And it's not only parents who pressurize us into making such boring career choices. It's relatives, neighbours, our parents' acquaintances, cousins we don't even know exist and the whole damn society.
Our life and achievements should be extravagant enough to allow our parents and our relatives and the entire neighbourhood to be bragging about to all the people they know. I have no idea why but we Indians have this habit of bragging about knowing or being related to successful people, even if we have nothing to do with their success.

Which is why, we are pressurized right from the beginning to be the best at everything. People will love you if you're an insufferable Know-It-All. Here, nerds get the highest appreciation. And "If you ain't a nerd, you ain't fit for survival, son." said the typical Indian Uncle.

So all we do is work our butts off and try to do something useful with our lives that the society and our parents approve of. We're told we can do whatever we want in life but that applies only to those things that our parents think are best for us. Our entire life is mapped out by our parents right from the beginning and their extremely high expectations and hopes are what fuel us throughout to be what everyone else wants us to be.
It's not that people don't ask what we want. They do, but no one appreciates change. Straying from the usual path taken by millions since ages is looked down on. And not everyone is liberal enough and happens to have a broad mindset. There's a reason we belong to different generations. They don't see the world the way we do and we don't exactly follow their ideas of life. The huge difference in perceptions and ideas has led to the writing of this post.

I know there are thousands of Indian teenagers out there who can't follow their hearts due to various reasons. And honestly, there isn't much that can be done about this. Situations like this don't come with a set of instructions and it's pretty hard to figure out what to do.
Standing at a crossroad where every single step has the ability to change your life forever is scary. And there's nothing braver than believing in yourself and simply marching forward on whatever path you choose, whether for yourself or for others, as long as you know it is the right thing to do.

-The Geek



Tuesday, 18 November 2014

Wings

Not everybody is brave enough to make a bold move or take a stand. Being firm about our beliefs and opinions is what the strength of our character is all about. It’s not everybody’s cup of tea to be strong enough to stand up against everyone else and deny all that they want you to do. Not every person has the courage to stare the world straight in the eye and take what is rightfully theirs.
There are such people in everybody’s lives who would grab every chance they get to take them down. But it’s not just them. It’s everybody else too.

People will always try to detain you. No matter how hard you try or how much you resist, they will try their best to take you down. The question is, will you let them do so? Will you simply allow the world to snatch away what truly is yours? Will you then do exactly as they tell you? Will you function according to their will?

You can do that. Choice is yours.
You can choose to be a puppet for the rest of your life if that’s what you want.

You are nothing but a toy to them. We all are. Whose opinion matters most; the society or yours? Who is it going to be; you with them, you for them or you against them?

A decision needs to be made and time is running out.

We all have that strong will power somewhere deep within ourselves that can help us fight all of those people who never wished well for us. Some people realize that in time while others take forever.

We all have wings to help us fly. We just need to discover them.

-The Geek